Happy Holidays, Everyone! I hope that you all get some well-deserved rest. I just finished my first trimester of graduate school for a degree in clinical psychology. It has been fascinating and I now can tell you as a student what lessons I’ve learned from listening to lectures, writing papers and taking exams. It’s been humbling for sure, and often times I thought to myself throughout the semester: “what would I tell my students.” In no particular order here they are:
Adapting took some time. I am an older student, but I know that in speaking to many members of my cohort many of us experienced some sort of “imposter syndrome.” This speaks directly to my students that are nervous about how their neurodiversity may show up. My lesson? Everyone is struggling with something. The more out you are, the more out other people feel that they can be.- Ask your resources for help.. This has been my biggest strength an what I have relied on the most. I was struggling with a research paper as I am developing a new skill. I definitely had that weekend in which I told myself I was going to do the paper, and then did everything else but the paper. Recognizing desperateness inside of me, I immediately thought to myself who can I reach out to? And emailed someone from the mentoring office who offered a time to me immediately and brainstormed with me. Then, after getting feedback on that paper from the professor, I made an appointment with the writing tutor for another paper that was due. Guess what she said?
- Be practical and go for “good enough” (that’s what she said). I couldn’t agree more and it is often what I tell my students. What
needs to get done? What is the minimum I need to do in order to pass the class and what are the steps I need to get there? I need to keep this in mind because I make tasks way harder than they are, become overwhelmed, and then risk it not being completed. - Ask peers for help. For at least two assignments and a test a friend and I would text back and forth about our thinking and why. This not only made the assignments and studying a little more fun, it also helped to solidify my knowledge and also helped to fill in gaps that were missing. There was also a paper I was struggling with. There was a student that had been a teacher before coming into the program and I knew she would be able to explain something to me that I was finding difficult.. This took some courage; I didn’t like to admit to another student that I was struggling and I also wasn’t sure if she would be able to help me. However, wiithin five minutes she helped me identify what I needed to move on to the next part of the assignment.
- When you ask for help, set aside your ego. Hard! When I met with the writing tutor, she wanted to see what I had written so far. What i had written was not for anyone’s eyes! It wasn’t even a “shitty rough draft,” but I needed guidance and we had limited time. It wasn’t worth it for me to explain this to her when she was there to help me hone my writing skills. This is a tricky thing to do! So many students I work with have so much shame around their skill level that it interferes with the ability to learn. If you can, process your emotions so that you can receive the feedback to build your skills (which I was able to do with others).
- Set deadlines for yourself with a reward. I am “deadline driven” (reframe of procrastinator). The dopamine kicks in the closer to the deadline something is due. But this is also terrifying for me. I can’t pull all nighters anymore. A week before I had a paper due, I set a reward for myself; I was going to have lunch with friends the day the paper was due. This meant, I needed to get the paper done before I went out with my friends. Because I had a reward to look forward to, and because I set the deadline for the day before, I was actually able to get it done.
Six is a fun number, so we’ll leave it at that! I’m excited to share more as I hone my study skills to better support you next trimester.
If you would like some support in honing your study skills, please feel free to schedule a complimentary destressify session here. I have a small amount of openings left in the New Year.
Happy holidays and I hope you have the chance to unwind for at least a few days this winter season.
Warmly,
Sarah Weidman
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