So Hum

Arriving back in Mexico has been a whirlwind of (goodness!) and busyness. After sobbing the night I left Northern California and a 2 am departure, it was an incredible blessing to be met at the airport by a good friend who took me to another good friend’s house where I had the fortune to stay for a couple of nights before leaving for a weekend at the beach. Not a bad return to Mexico at all.

I have been busy with work and training, both of which, I can say have been quite a pleasure. I spent much of summer  sitting on the porch of my kind guests’ beautiful house tree-gazing. Sometimes thinking, “Hmm…am I doing enough? Should I…and then I would continue to to tree-gaze sometimes thinking about the should I’s, sometimes napping, and much of the time really just staring. That tranquility somehow transferred to this crazy busy city and school year life and although my days are filled from before dawn until eight or nine o’clock all of it is a pleasure and filled with experiences that I enjoy.

Upon arriving to Mexico, my friend recommended a 21 day free online meditation sponsored by Oprah and Deepak Choprah. To ease myself back and to give myself some structured meditation I signed up for it. One meditation, in particular stuck with me: “So hum.” So-I am hum-all that there is. I am all that there is, or Deepak Choprah’s interpretation: “I am enough.”  Just being in all that I am doing all the time, through stress and happiness, work and home, has been a high priority and a challenge. In fact, I think I only surround myself with people that seem to just be so naturally because I find it so much easier to accept that within myself when others can accept it for themselves.

In working with children, their parents and other teachers (all of us an incredible bunch, and  our control and sensitivity buttons ready to be pushed at a simple, small miscommunication’s notice) I find “just being” to be at the utmost importance as it allows me to connect, listen, and empathize; essential pieces to this line of work.  And so when it came time to prepare for Back-to-School Night I found myself in a total complete panic. I wasn’t worried about what the parents would think of me (for once), but I wanted the parents to feel that they could be completely who they were and leave feeling safe, warm, and happy. Thankful to a friend whose third time  offer of YOU CAN COME OVER AND I WILL HELP YOU I finally accepted, we created the most, ME presentation EVER. And I think it had the desired effect. Here are two fun examples:

I had an activity planned in which parents take three M&M’s, and answer questions based on the color of the M&M’s with their table members. As parents were coming in, the M&M’s were already on the table. I looked over at one table and all of the M&M’s were gone.  Making light of the situation, I walked over to refill their plate and  joked that of course they could eventually eat the M&M’s but it was for an activity.Well, apparently that table didn’t hear me because I looked over and the M&M’s were gone again!! My control button buzzed like crazy,  but also so did a complete sense of  hilarity.  It was just ridiculously funny (kind of laughing at myself for caring so much too)! And of course, when I introduced the activity the M&M eater was very sweetly embarrassed (I didn’t say anything, he just realized).

 Another very funny moment was when the Spanish teacher was giving her presentation, a mom came up to me and I said, “Oh thanks so much for coming! And she said…”Oh no..I’m not leaving. I just got my period. Do you have anything??” Total transparency and randomness…and I LOVED it.

And here I am. I came down with a mild cold on Thursday, enough to  keep me from  training today and perhaps tomorrow. The should I’s are running through my head like mad. So Hum.

May you always feel like you are enough. Because you are.


One response to “So Hum

  1. Sarah Weidman is the one of the most honest writers I know. I just loved this piece. It is such a great reminder. You are enough because you are. I am enough because I am. And we, together, are plenty!
    Thank you Sarah!

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